A Crock Full of Happiness

Happiness is always a by-product. It is probably a matter of temperament, and for anything I know it may be glandular. But it is not something that can be demanded from life, and if you are not happy you had better stop worrying about it and see what treasures you can pluck from your own brand of unhappiness.—Robertson Davies

What a crock. Here's a man who's father was a Canadian Senator. He never went hungry or cold. His family owned a media empire. Was there anything he ever had to worry about? Did he have unhappiness to pluck treasures from, or did his treasures just show up via the family bank account?

Is happiness always a by-product? Of what? When I play guitar I'm happy. Is the happiness a by-product of my playing guitar, or is it the reason I play? I certainly don't play guitar to be sad. In a very important way, the happiness is what I am seeking when I play guitar. It is no more a by-product than the music, the vibrations, or the art. The happiness is integral. Even when I play a sad song, that reminds me of someone who's dead, or ill, I still feel better during and after playing the song.

Is happiness a matter of temperament?

3 a: the peculiar or distinguishing mental or physical character determined by the relative proportions of the humors according to medieval physiology b: characteristic or habitual inclination or mode of emotional response c: extremely high sensibility ; especially : excessive sensitiveness or irritability

This last definition helps to prove the opposite, that is, that unhappiness can be a matter excessive sensitiveness or irritability. But Davies is suggesting that happiness is a matter of inclination or mode of emotional response. Well, duh. If you're inclined to be happy, you will be. If you're unable to pay your rent because your illness has made it impossible to be gainfully employed, while your government has lowered the safety net to within inches of the floor it's supposed to stop you from hitting, well, then you're not exactly inclined to be happy.

If you worked 20 years to find that the work you've been doing has been destroying your body to the point where you can't do the work anymore, that's an inclination toward a mode of emotional response that Davies was likely unfamiliar with: fear and loathing.

Can happiness be demanded of life? Sure. Here: I demand happiness. Did that help me get any? Did my life listen to me? Did anyone? Doesn't the act of demanding something make me sound like a spoiled kid who expects his parents to provide whatever he needs and desires?

How about if I'm just provided with what I need? Would that be enough to make me happy? Well, show me the happy starving people. Show me the happy homeless people. I knew a homeless guy who was a pretty good harmonica player. He was a Vietnam veteran who begged by the freeway exit in downtown Los Angeles. I would drive by on my way to get paid for destroying my spinal cartilage. I would talk to him on my lunch break sometimes. Always gave him a few bucks, and he would play a little blues. Sounded good. He looked happy while he was playing. And then he would stop, put the harmonica back in his pocket, and look miserable again. Think maybe a room, three square, and some new shoes would make him happier? You bet it would. Are those bare necessities something he can demand? Sure. Will that demand get him those things? Not if no one who can help is listening.

What about happiness being glandular? Or, since Mr. Davies lived before modern brain chemistry science, we'll be magnanimous and say maybe happiness can be given medically. Is there a happy pill? Can some drug make me forget that I can't pay my electric bill? Can some medical treatment make me happy that I can't send my kid to college, or that my car's going to be repossessed?

As part of my pain management regimen of daily drugs, I was on Prozac (fluoxetine hydrochloride) for a while. Technically, it's more of an anti-unhappy pill, and for pain patients it's usually given in small doses. It's a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor, which means, if the theories are correct, depression can be avoided because the drug helps serotonin stay in the synaptic gap longer than usual, helping the receptors of the recipient cell by stimulating it. New research suggests that a persons genetic make-up may make them unable to benefit from these drugs, so, in their case, there isn't much hope for unhappiness being treated glandularly, it seems happiness is not glandular. At least not yet. The prospect of designer drugs may yet create your own personal soma, but religiously inspired restrictions in stem cell research have put that on the back burner for a while.

For other people, like me, for whom the side-effects (diarrhea, nausea, inability to ejaculate) of the happy pill only cause further unhappiness, it doesn't make much sense to take the pill. The small amount of pain relief caused by reducing the amount of depression is offset by the depression caused by the side effects. The glandular route to happiness, or less unhappiness, if it exists at all, isn't available in this case either.

For some people, Prozac, and other anti-depressants, works. It makes their lives a little more bearable. But in those cases, it seems, the drug is being used to correct a chemical imbalance in the patient's brain. Have we made them happier? In the sense that we have reduced their unhappiness, yes. But, this is only for some people. So, as a universal definition of happiness, it seems to not be glandular.

Since the unhappiness being experienced by the desperate, the poor, the sick, et al, is something we've evolved to feel, an uncomfortableness that supposedly motivates us to pluck some improved existence out of fat air, maybe we shouldn't be messing around with it. Perhaps the run of the mill unhappiness, created by forces outside of our control which we are supposed to deal with in some magic way (which the Republican Party defines as entrepreneurial free market forces coupled with hard work), should be allowed to run the mill, so to speak. Perhaps unhappiness, and the stress that works in conjunction with it, creates the impetus to do something to improve things, to end the unhappiness, to create happiness.

So, I'll write something. I'll play the guitar. I'll feel better for a while. And then I'll hear the rush of air, feel the weightlessness of free fall, and reality will rush back in like the flight or flight response. I'll send more letters to relatives begging for a loan, or work, or charity. I'll contact more former clients asking them if they need work done. I'll plow through more emails from more people telling me how hard this recession is hitting them too. And I'll be right back where I was, falling through the financial air with the greatest of ease, wondering if the "safety net" that's left after 8 years of Bush's Disaster Capitalism will stop my fall before I hit the ground. And then I will stop worrying for a moment about my ruined credit, stack of medical bills, negative bank balance, and near empty propane tank covered in snow, to see what treasure I can pluck out of my brand of unhappiness.

What a nice view.

On Unhappiness

I've been lucky. I've never been really destitute, although there have been times, like now, where I've had to eat a lot of beans. My credit has gone from bad to good to back to bad again.

But what I'm facing right now is like no other time, ever. After my disability forced me to stop working as a stagehand, I had some money saved, cashed the 401k, and managed to move out of Los Angeles and up here to upstage upstate NY, where it's cheap and we have family. I was managing to pay the bills with the small income I got from my internet marketing business.

That's all changed now. The savings are all gone. The business is drying up as this economy forces my clients to cut back, and keeps new ones from stepping up. The credit is maxed out and ruined, the bills are stacking up, cut-off notices are coming in, and the only money on the horizon isn't until a possible settlement or court decision in my worker's comp case back in California.

So, when I hear people talk about how Americans are still pretty happy, or that money can't buy happiness, or that everything's going to be OK if you just believe it, I just want to say, bullshit.

And it's not just me. Americans in general just aren't feeling the love right now. In a post about the state of happiness in the US, Freakonomics blogger Justin Wolfers goes over the evidence that this is a very unhappy time in America.

We’re still happy? No way. Life satisfaction has plummeted during the recession.

And all that crap about money not buying happiness, or money not making people any happier past a certain cut-off point. Also bullshit. Besides the obvious, I mean, sure, there are unhappy billionaires, but show me happy starving people... If you really look into the economic data, it seems that the richer you are, the happier you are.

Is that really a surprise?

I'm more interested in the down side. How unhappy do you get as they money dries up? How unhappy are the hungry and the homeless compared to those who are still, albeit just barely, getting by? How low can you go before your heart breaks, your will caves in, and you just give up?

This all is, of course, quite subjective, but we do have sociological studies into this. In these trying times, perhaps it would be a good idea to really study unhappiness, it's effects on people's health and behavior (crime rates are going up), and find ways that we can help people who are, like I am, at their wit's end.

Worst. Year. Ever.

I can't even make it to the end.

Even a new, pragmatic, intelligent president can't pull this one up from the bottom.

This is the year I found I can't work anymore. The year I lost my house. The year my pain got much worse. The year the money ran out. Hell, I'm one of the lucky ones.

Could be worse. Could be -3 degrees.

Oh, wait, it is.

Could be worse. Could be giving birth in a tree during a flood.

Good night and good luck.

Organic Kona Coffee Is Back, Talking Story on Hawaii

Back in 1998, when we were living on Maui, I was contacted by an organic Kona coffee farmer about helping him sell his gourmet coffee beans. He was one of my best clients until he sold his farm and retired in 2006. So, I was pleasantly surprised when I heard from Mike Tucker, one of the guys who bought Dr. Faust's farm.

Tucker has been refurbishing the farm, getting organic control of the weeds (cutting them), installing his own processing equipment, starting and planting his own coffee tree seedlings, getting the Hawaiian coffee farm certified organic, and much more. It's an amazing amount of work to farm anything organically, especially coffee.

Great thing about this story is that you can read the entire experience, because Mike kept a journal of the entire organic coffee farm refurbishing story, and it is now his blog. Judging from what is there already, this would be a good blog to subscribe to if you're into organic agriculture at all. All you organic coffee farmers will love it!

Or maybe you just love fresh roasted organic Kona coffee beans showing up ot your front door when there's a foot of snow outside. Like me.

Maybe you're a real coffee nut and you want to home roast your own organic green coffee beans from Hawaii... Mike says you can use an old popcorn air popper!

You don't have to Digg organic Kona coffee in order to Digg the story of organic Kona coffee farming. It's an enticing blog, like the aroma of fresh brewed... Ah, you get the idea! Plus, there are all kinds of great pictures of Hawaii, the big island of the Hawaiian Islands.

The organic Kona coffee from 1500 feet up the side of Mauna Loa near the Hawaiian sanctuary town of Honaunau is back! And it is better than ever!

Interview with the Pakistani Spectator

I was contacted by the Pakistani Spectator for an interview, which was fun. I don't get a lot of interview requests, but when I do, it's always from very interesting corners of the world. This blog is especially interesting, coming from one of the "hottest" places on earth, in terms of instability and terrorism. Of course, Pakistanis are just like everyone else in the world: they're being taken advantage of by rich plutocrats too!

My Suggestion for Obama's Energy Department

Ever since I was a teenager reading about alternative energy, my hero has been Amory Lovins of the Rocky Mountain Institute. Reading the Freakonomics blog today, there was a little mention of how many readers are suggesting what I had only dared to dream: that we make Amory Lovins Secretary of Energy. Now, this is what I call an Energy Department.

The Electoral College Is Absurd

Anyone who's ever visited my Bush Quotes page knows I hate the Electoral College. I hadn't thought about it much, with Obama so far ahead in the polls, but this little doozy reminded me:

"This system, along with the winner-take-all practice used to allocate most states' electoral votes, creates the potential for an absurd outcome. In the unlikely event that all 213 million eligible voters cast ballots, either John McCain or Barack Obama could win enough states to capture the White House with only 47.8 million strategically located votes. The presidency could be won with just 22 percent of the electorate's support, only 16 percent of the entire population's."

Bombing and Killing for Political Purposes: Terrorism?

According to Sarah Palin, bombing abortion clinics is not "terrorism."

Brian Williams: Is an abortion clinic bomber a terrorist under this definition?

Sarah Palin: (Exasperated sigh.) There’s no question that Bill Ayers by his own admittance was one who thought to destroy our U.S. Capitol and our Pentagon. That is a domestic terrorist. There is no question there. Now others who would want to engage in harming innocent Americans or facilities that it would be unacceptable to, I don’t know if you’re gonna use the word "terrorist" there.

Digg this and follow the link to the story. There's video there.

Organic Gardening And Blogging About It (again)!

Back in the cave man days of the internet, I created one of the world's first organic gardening web sites. We lived in the mountains north of Los Angeles, and I had a great backyard garden. Then we moved to Hawaii for a year, and we had a banana tree and a small tropical garden. Then we moved back to LA, and for over 10 years I just didn't have enough room or soil to grow anything but a few flowers. So, I got a little out of practice.

Because of my recent disability retirement from the stagehand world, we moved to upstate NY, and now I'm gardening again, blogging about it in the Organic Gardening News Blog, and loving it. The fall garden of greens, peas, lettuce, spinach, and, of course, arugula for election night are all doing great, despite the four frosts we've had already. Every day is another day of fresh, local, solar powered food before a long winter.

Maui Hawaii Home Sharing Friend

My friend Cherie is the owner and operator of the Hale Hookipa Inn Maui Bed and Breakfast. She was one of my first internet marketing clients. When she told me she wanted to start a blog, I was happy to hear it. Not only could I use the work right now, but I look forward to reading what she has to say. She has been deeply involved in the Maui community for years. She is a business owner who works hard to keep her head above water. She is an environmentalist. I'm sure she has a lot to say.

Her new blog is Ho'okipa Aikane, or, roughly, home sharing friend. I asked her to explain who she is and why she's doing this. Here's her reply:

I am a long time resident of Hawaii, I moved here as a teenager who loved the ocean and warm weather.

After raising my family, I found myself on my own on the island of Maui. In 1994, I purchased an old run down Portuguese family home in Upcountry Maui. This gem was built in 1924, and I cried when I first saw it. I wondered what happened to the original family....? It was a beautiful craftsman style home in some MAJOR disrepair, but the bones were good. In my usual optimistic approach, I figured, why not? I can do this.

It's been an amazing journey...with a laughable budget, I have managed to restore and give new life to my home. It is now Hale Ho'okipa Inn.

I hope to share stories, and life in upcountry Maui and Hawaii Nei with anyone who wants to peek in.

A hui ho...until later!!

Be sure to subscribe to her feed. It will be worth it.

We Are New Yorkers Now!

I haven't posted in months because we were moving, looking for a house to rent for months, and then moving in. We packed up and left Los Angeles after I was diagnosed with osteoarthritis and told not to lift over 20 pounds ever again. That put an end to the stagehand career, so I won't be reporting from backstage anymore. I still have a lot of stagehand friends from all over the world, and I will post when I get good second hand info on that long plastic hallway, as Hunter Thompson referred to the entertainment business.

We got some great pictures from our trip. I've posted the first of those, from Yosemite National Park, over at the computer backgrounds photo blog. There are plenty more. Robin took a whole bunch of her abstract photos, including some great ones of Reno. We have some great road shots from some beautiful backroads in Wyoming. We loved Mount Rushmore and got some great pictures from there, where it snowed big, flaky snow...

We stopped for deep dish pizza on the south side of Chicago (Obama's neighborhood) and really lucked out thanks to a local man who sent us to the perfect place (Pizza Nova on 43rd). We ate that delicious pizza while we sat on the shore of Lake Michigan, in Marquette Park, near Gary, Indiana. We'll be putting those pictures up soon.

We're moved in to our new home, near Cooperstown, New York. Now that I'm out of the stage business, I'm looking for web site work. So, if you need, or know someone who needs, higher search engine rankings, please get in touch!

Open the Pod Bay Doors, Please HAL

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."--Arthur C. Clarke, 1917-2008

Updated Dreams of Kauai

This time of year, our friends and relatives in colder environs like to at least dream about a getaway bungalow on a Hawaiian beach. It's a cheap way to warm the mind: download a few pictures of a beach just on the other side of a nice lawn, with plenty of room for a family football game.

Of course, in the case of this particular island getaway, it's not as expensive as you'd think. While there is no shortage of luxury villas for rent in Hawaii, there are precious few Hawaii beach rentals available to the middle class family that saved all their lives for a trip to Hawaii.

Now that the home equity loans aren't there to finance your Hawaii vacation, it's time to look into the affordable side of Hawaii, which could really use some tourists right now. When the recession comes, the first thing people cut back on is travel. But if you do it right, you can still enjoy paradise on a budget. Sometimes, it's the best way to really see a place.

Gently Cynical Progress: Learning from the Wisdom of Eric Hoffer

The opposite of the religious fanatic is not the fanatical atheist but the gentle cynic who cares not whether there is a god or not.--Eric Hoffer, the Longshoreman Philosopher

When my daughter, who's about to cast her very first vote for Barack Obama, was 6, she told me I couldn't be an atheist, because I had no faith. What I have, dear girl, is a healthy cynicism. So healthy, in fact, that it often too vigorously cares, and should shut up.

A gentle cynic himself, Eric Hoffer was awarded the Presidential Medal of Honor, by Ronald Reagan. From his Wikipedia page:

Concerned about the rise of totalitarian governments, especially those of Adolf Hitler and Josef Stalin, he tried to find the roots of these "madhouses" in human psychology. He discovered that fanaticism and self-righteousness are rooted in self-hatred, self-doubt, and insecurity. As he describes in The True Believer, a passionate obsession with the outside world or with the private lives of other people is merely a craven attempt to compensate for a lack of meaning in one's own life.

Self-righteous fanaticism describes well the current state of Religion and the GOP. Considering the control that Evangelical Airmen have over the US Air Force, one could say it is a very well-armed self-righteous fanaticism that has worked its way into our government. The Evangelical GOP favorite Mike Huckabee offers a stunning example of the Religious Right's successes in running candidates who are more and more theocratic. For these fanatics, religion is not an opiate. It is a crow bar for prying into your rights. It invades our homes, enslaves our women, controls our bodies, decides our law, and fuels our wars.

The US Constitution says your "highest" law is just that. Yours. If your highest law tells you to dictate religion through government, too bad. We call that unconstitutional. You must be stopped. Fascism and theocracy are crimes in this country. It's not a question of right or left. Over two centuries of American Progress proves that free religion is necessary if we are to have any other freedoms. Freedom from religion seems to be the basis for Peace on Earth.

Whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.--2 Chr.15:13

With Gods like that, who needs Devils? How can any Christian read that and then criticize the Koran for calling for the murder of infidels? How can any Christian read that and let me live? I really don't care if there's a god or not, so I don't have to kill you. If you believe the Bible is the word of God, then you must kill me right now. Maybe you don't take the Bible literally. Maybe that just means you should pass amendments to the Constitution banning gay marriage and abortion while forcing prayer in public school and abstinence only sex education?

Maybe Satan wrote the Bible.

The Christian Right has slowly changed the GOP, which has painted itself into a red-white-and-blue cross-shaped corner. They are about to learn something else that Eric Hoffer learned about movements: without self-esteem, they go nowhere. Nothing demolishes self-esteem like failure.

Which brings me to George W Bush. His "...craven attempt to compensate for a lack of meaning..." probably feels downright Biblical to him. He thought God told him what to do. He thought wrong. Or Satan did it. Or something. Those left in the GOP who believe Bush has succeeded, that all is well, that Mike Huckabee will be the next President, will know the empty downsizing of failure soon enough. If Mike Huckabee wins the nomination, it will signal the end of Republican dominance in American politics.

Now we begin the slow, gently cynical progress toward sanity, reason, and tolerance.

Cross-posted at the Daily KOS and Street Prophets.

Mixed Blessing: Daily Show and Colbert Report Returning Without Writers

Well, maybe it will be enough to satisfy my jones for some political humor. Or maybe it will just make me want more, thicker, jucier comedy. Or maybe these two guys really are pretty damn funny on their own. Their joint statement seems to say so:

We would like to return to work with our writers. If we cannot, we would like to express our ambivalence, but without our writers we are unable to express something as nuanced as ambivalence.

Holiday Food for Los Angeles

'Tis the season to eat. And if your house is anything like ours, you're getting tired of cooking and cleaning already. So, take a break! Order something special!

Emma Tate, who, in the interest of full disclosure, is a search engine marketing client of mine, runs an award winning catering company in Los Angeles that specializes in southern comfort foods. This time of year, comfort is exactly what you need, especially when it comes to food. Emma runs Culinary Delight Catering in Los Angeles, and has been comforting people with her food services for 25 years. It doesn't matter if you want full service catering and event planning, like for a wedding or Holiday party, or just some Red Velvet Cupcakes delivered to your place of business (your employees will love you forever), Culinary Delight Catering is the Los Angeles caterer for you!

If you would like to eat healthy for a change (or for at least a few meals) this holiday season, Emma's meal program can deliver healthy meals (designed for any special dietary needs) on a daily or weekly basis. If you want to take a delicious, yet still healthy, break from the Holiday eating season, these custom meals, delivered directly to your home or office, are a great way to take a break from cooking and still eat delicious, home-cooked food.

Viral Email Hatred - the Muslim "Christmas" Stamp Crap

An otherwise regular person I know, someone with no obvious racial hatred of bigotry, forwarded an email calling for a "boycott" of a Muslim "Christmas" stamp. The mail itself, one of many we've all gotten, didn't really surprise me. The person who sent it did.

Here's my reply:

First of all, this is not a "Christmas" stamp, and it's not new. You can read the history of this "controversy" here.

Interesting that even "president" Bush promotes this stamp on the White House web site.

Now, if I were to go back in history, say, to the Panama invasion where American forces killed 3000 innocent civilians, and then I said that was a "Christian firebombing" of an entire city block, that wouldn't really be fair to the Christian religion, now would it? Or, what if we said that the 1,000,000 Iraqi Civilians killed in Iraq were the result of a "Christian" invasion? That wouldn't be fair.

I try to remember that when I see religious nuts like Muslim Bombers or the Reverend Fred Phelps (who shows up at soldiers' funerals saying they died because we condone homosexuality), that they do not represent their whole religion. That's why this email is obviously from a bigot, recirculated now from a probable Giuliani supporter who knows the Republicans are going to lose unless they scare everyone with the big bad Muslim bogey man.

About a year ago, the Muslim woman who lives around here was trying to get someone to give her car a jump. No one would help her. When I stopped, she was crying. Her kids were in the back seat crying. I felt so bad for her. She couldn't stop thanking me. She never bombed anyone. She was just grocery shopping.

Turns out that in this Mormon neighborhood, I--a devout agnostic--did the most "Christian" thing.

Furthermore, this email goes on to suggest that I'm not patriotic because I won't boycott this stamp. I'm so sick of these right wing nut cases saying that because I don't buy into their particular line of racist crap that I'm not patriotic. Please tell me who wrote this, or just send this mail back to them. I'd like to let them know that there are plenty of patriotic Americans who think it is people like them who are ruining this country. I'd like them to call me unpatriotic to my face.

Please keep sending me these things so I can point out how crazy and bigoted they are.

Canyon Country California Fire Pictures

My wife Robin took these pictures during the recent fire in our neighborhood. We've had fires around here before, but never could we see flames from our back yard. Many homes up on the hill near us were lost.

The smoke in the air, and the way the sun interacted with it, created an eerie look that Robin captured in these photographs, which we've posted over at our photo blog.

My Local One Union Brothers on Strike

A stagehand friend of mine sent me this story about a typical Broadway stagehand, who's on strike. It reminded me a of great period in my career as a stagehand, and got me thinking about this crazy career.

Back in the summer of 2000, I went to New York to learn how to operate the automation for the LA version of The Lion King, which was built by Hudson Scenic. The New York version of the show was still running at the New Amsterdam Theatre, home to many great shows including the Ziegfeld Follies. We spent our days at Hudson's shop in Yonkers, and at night we went to the show where we watched and learned backstage. I'll never forget the tour Drew Sicardi, the head carpenter, gave us of the theater above the theater, known as the Roof Garden Theater, where a racier version of the Follies, the Midnight Frolics, played, starring Fanny Brice. It was just a concrete shell of a theatre, but I was amazed at the sense of history and the grooves in the floor where blocks of ice were put to cool the big theater downstairs.

I've been a stagehand for 20 years, but being backstage on Broadway welled up a sense of history and awe. Mostly I was amazed at how small the theaters are. Working in LA, space is usually never a problem (I say usually because I spent the last few years working in the Mark Taper Forum, where space is always a problem). But in New York, especially on a show the size of The Lion King, I was amazed at how they got so much in such a small space. As if working backstage on a Broadway show isn't hard enough. Depending on the show, people scurry all over the place trying to do things at precisely the right moment. Traffic patterns, technical problems, actor variations, and many other variables make each show an adventure. The stress is enormous. So is the sense of accomplishment.

I got to know a lot of those IATSE Local One guys. Many of them came out to LA and helped install our Lion King at the Pantages Theater in Hollywood. These are some of the hardest working guys in the world, and they have a very specialized set of skills. People don't really understand what stagecraft is all about. The hours are awful. The work--a combination of the worst aspects of movers, riggers, mechanics, electricians, technicians, and construction workers--is extremely hard. Perhaps the worst part is that usually the only time anyone notices a stagehand is when they screw up.

For this production--the strike--hopefully people are noticing the stagehands for a better reason. And when you hear from some anti-labor people how much the "typical" stagehand in New York makes, remember what they do and that they live and work in New York. It's all relative.

Hang in there guys. You've earned the respect you deserve.

William Gibson on the Present

Check out this William Gibson interview in Rolling Stone.

You made your name as a science-fiction writer, but in your last two novels you've moved squarely into the present. Have you lost interest in the future?

It has to do with the nature of the present. If one had gone to talk to a publisher in 1977 with a scenario for a science-fiction novel that was in effect the scenario for the year 2007, nobody would buy anything like it. It's too complex, with too many huge sci-fi tropes: global warming; the lethal, sexually transmitted immune-system disease; the United States, attacked by crazy terrorists, invading the wrong country. Any one of these would have been more than adequate for a science-fiction novel. But if you suggested doing them all and presenting that as an imaginary future, they'd not only show you the door, they'd probably call security.

Academy Award Winner's Art

Tambi Larsen won an Oscar in 1956, for Best Art Direction-Set Decoration, Black-and-White. The movie was The Rose Tattoo, starring Burt Lancaster.

Tambi Larsen was also an accomplished artist who hung out in this Hawaii beach house in Kauai, creating Hawaiian art like this drawing (right). I'm working on the Hale Kilo I'a web site, and I've convinced Larsen's daughter, who owns and operates the Kauai vacation rental house, to continue posting Larsen's art on the site. Two of the drawings, including the one shown here, are available in big versions that make great computer backgrounds or desktop wallpaper.

Go check it out! The pictures of the Hawaiian Island of Kauai are also worth checking out, especially for all you snow-bound folks who want to think warm thoughts. And the good news is: for a private north-shore Kauai beach house, you'll find the Hale Kilo I'a quite affordable.

Get your Daily Show Fix

This hilarious bit from Daily Show writer Jason Ross will help all you Daily Show fans who are suffering withdrawals. We even had to take the season pass off our Tivo, because we've seen all these reruns. Thanks, Jason, for explaining this strike to my kids in such a creative way. Now I feel like I should send money.

Dare to Colbert

We're big fans of Stephen Colbert. We think that watching his show, The Colbert Report, actually makes people smarter. So, we're all for encouraging people to watch. Even the repeats...

Of course, if you're one of the 25% if Americans who think Colbert was picking on the most powerful man on earth during the now famous correspondent's dinner, you probably want him arrested and waterboarded, like you do anyone else you disagree with. So, you Bush lovers probably won't care for one of these Dare to Colbert T-shirts (available in organic cotton and made in the USA). For you Bush lovers, we're working on a pesticide-ridden, made-with-slave-labor-in-some-freedom-hating-country t-shirt depicting Adam and Eve riding to church on dinosaurs, er, Jesus horses (if we don't create those shirts soon, you'll know it's because we couldn't work out a way to get royalties to Tina Fey).

These are great gifts for all the Colbert fans out there who are suffering withdrawals during this writer's strike. Help make the world a smarter place. Help spread the news. Dare to Colbert!

Tool for Manipulating Reality

The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words.--Philip K. Dick

The word manipulators, as most of you stuck watching reruns of Colbert know, are on strike. At issue are a few pennies of the billions in profit the producers make by manipulating reality. If the writers got everything they asked for, some producer's daughter somewhere might have to settle for factory rims on her new Mercedes when she heads off to her Ivy League college next fall.

So, the dominoes are starting to fall. Here in LA, the backstage people in my union, IATSE Local 33, are already losing their jobs. We've been told that because of the "no-strike" conditions in our contracts, we cannot honor the writers' lines. We must go to work. Funny, that, since without the word manipulators, there is no reality to manipulate, no work to be done. Soaps, sit-coms, Leno... All shut down.

Those of us who do have work to go to have been told not to write anything if we're asked. You know, because that happens all the time. There have been times, while I'm sitting on top of an A Ladder focusing a light that those damn producers just won't quit bugging me to rewrite that last scene. So, that's how we stagehands are showing solidarity for our writer friends. We're refusing to write.

A grip I knew died recently. He had a sign in his truck that said:

Good, fast, cheap: pick two.

Like so many other businesses in this world, the reality manipulation people are going with fast and cheap these days. Just don't see too many orders for good anymore.

Politics without Principles

In human society, all violence can be traced back to these seven recurrent blunders: wealth without work, pleasure without conscience, knowledge without character, commerce without morality, science without humanity, worship without sacrifice, and politics without principles.

–Mohandas K. Ghandi (મોહનદાસ કરમચંદ ગાંધી), Young India, Oct. 22, 1925 reproduced in: Collected Works, vol. 33, p. 135