A Fundamental Problem for Fundamentalists

Mohamen Mehdi Ouazanni as Satan from The Bible on the History Channel

An old friend, who for these purposes goes by the name ThomasD, had me build a blog for him many years ago. He wanted to get the attention of people who claim to base their beliefs and actions on the teachings of the Bible. ThomasD often has brilliant insights into the workings of the Christian mind, and in the case of his blog, he used one of his most insightful insights, ie, that the God of the Bible seems really, really worried that the readers of the Bible might not believe he wrote it. ThomasD postulated that perhaps, just perhaps, given the details of the matter, the evidence points to the possibility that Satan Wrote the Bible.

This is from the essay that started it all:

The first three commandments tell followers that there is only one God and that the author of the Commandments is it. Not only is he the one and only God but if you dare to question him, he will lay a curses on you and your children and your children’s children. That goes beyond jealousy. That is vindictive in the extreme. Why not give the future generations a chance to make their own mistakes? The answer is that this “god”, the god who caused the writing of this Bible, doesn't want anyone to question him. Why? Perhaps because questioning will lead to a better understanding of the world than the one presented in the Bible.

It's an interesting, and provocative point. The God of the Bible really seems worried that readers will, as the Blog's tagline says, "Leave your leap of faith behind and use your God-given mind."

ThomasD has a talent for capturing the essence of his conversation with fundamentalists and various other sects of people who seem determined to not use the brain they believe God gave them. His latest example of this kind of dialogue, on the apparent inability of fundamentalists to understand allegory, was a real gem, worthy of repeating here, without further comment.

Me: You believe life is a gift?
CF (Christian Fundamentalist): Yes.
Me: A gift from God?
CF: Yes.
Me: God the Father?
CF: Yes.
Me: Do you think life is a wonderful gift?
CF: Obviously.
Me: You are a father. Have you given your children gifts?
CF: Of course.
Me: Imagine giving your son a wonderful gift, the best gift you could imagine and he said “Thank you Dad. What else did you get me?” How would that make you feel?
CF: What’s your point?
Me: God gave you a wonderful gift, you say, but you turn around and ask for another life, a heaven that you know nothing about other than you are sure it is better than this life, this gift. How do you think that would make God feel?
CF: I’m not God.
Me: You believe you were created in God’s image. God shows lots of feelings and emotions that you can identify with including rage. You call him your Father in Heaven. If I gave my son a beautiful bicycle that he wanted and he said, “Thanks Dad. What else did you get me? I’d be pissed.
CF: I’m sure you are a good father.